Only you, baby.

2005-12-01T07:27:07Z

I feel great! Normally, after a 2 hour phone call, I don’t. It mostly depends on caller/receiver. Or maybe it has something to do with the fact that last time I had verbal communication with this person was about a year and half ago. It may even be longer. All I know is that it was before I starting keeping call records. Boy it was great talking to her again. I had been thinking about her a lot recently and it was finally nice to hear her voice. We reminisced a little bit, but mostly shared our recent experiences( emotional and “what-not”) and also our fears of growing up. She sounded really delighted to hear from. I hope she was. I was very happy to hear from her. ; )

cross my heart, hope to die
i swear i won’t say what happened that night
so starting today things are gonna be all right
your best you tried, and yeah you did fine
no better than fine, perfect in my mind
in fact, i wish your heart was mine
and i can hear the memory in my ears
back to the years and all those tears
but hear me when i say i’m glad we steered that way
because now we’re here
--The Rocket Summer

Fun is what we have. Have is what we fun.

2005-08-26T06:21:18Z

Many people tell me that they do not know anything about me. That's true. Of course, how would someone know more about me than I know myself? Alright, to be honest, I am not a very open person. Especially with emotions and feelings. I rarely ever honestly express how I am feeling through physical emotion. I am very good at masking my emotional state. Those that know me well can truly say they have seen my "happy." When I am having a good time, you'll know it. Most likely not through my actions...unless you are one of the lucky few. I have fun a lot. I like to have fun. However, I often do not look like I am having fun. I can not explain why, that's who I am. You can not honestly tell me that you have never had a day where you were completely fine and enjoying yourself, but just didn't show any signs of it all. Com'on you know you have had a day like that. That is what my day was like today. I had a lot of fun; I enjoyed myself quite a bit. I just had no intention of expressing it physically. I hope this helps those with questions. Now, to cover a front that has been losing...but not with my troops. My true friends can tell you that I rarely disclose any information, be it meaning-less or not, voluntarily. However, I will spill out most information if I am engaged into a conversation or asked directly. This subject is slightly easier for me to explain. I do this because I feel that most of what I could say has no relevance, meaning, or desire to be heard. I would rather not burden people with my jabber. Unfortunately, people seem to consider this information crucial to understanding a person. It's a bunch of bull to me. Most of what is said is just a formality...no one really cares where you went to lunch (for example). It clearly a social tool used by the insecure to develop a weak bond between one person to another. A bond that is built on lies (subconscious or not) and useless information. I feel that most of it is a waste of time. That is why I rarely talk...mainly with "adults" for that swap irrelevant jabber all the time. Do not judge because I am quite and keep to myself, I merely do not want you and I to create a "bond" (or friendship if you will) that both of us know has no substance. If you feel you do not know me, then ask me directly...don't ask me how my day was, I know you don't care (I don't really care either). I just wanted to express how I feel about these things as they seem to have come up recently. I hope that you now understand, and if you don't, then maybe you should ask me directly (it's a better way to get to know me than asking if I had fun at the fair).

--Travis

Happy Nick, I have finally posted in this thing. See this and more at 42site.com.

The Forgotten Soul

Only you, baby.

Fun is what we have. Have is what we fun.